Monday, April 7, 2014

BATTLES OF THE SEXES, A ZERO SUM GAME?

Icheoku says femininity is sexy and even sexier if it is self-respecting and does not unnecessarily and incessantly clash with masculinity. God made X and Y chromosomes so that they can compliment each other BUT not to compete amongst themselves as to who controls what or inadvertently get too confrontational and combustive against each other. There is a role for each person and understanding this cardinal rule of engagement makes some marriages seem tailored in heaven; while so many others are living, hellish nightmares destined to you know where - perdition. 

Icheoku understands that YES, women have rights, BUT it does not include trampling on the manhood of their male companions as this becomes a hostile takeover of manhood and no longer a relationship; which embodies the spirit of give and take and recognising that each has a distinctive role to play in a relationship. To those women who want to be treated as Queen, remember to first crown your husband the King of the house and watch him sizzle and dazzle you, her Queen. If you want to be treated as a princess, first make your husband a prince and watch him ride in shining armour in answer to all your needs. People want to feel wanted and the moment you discard your spouse, you have lost him or her.

To all those feminists out there, who have converted their husbands into glorified houseboys in the name of securing their "FREEDOM or EQUALITY", Icheoku asks, why did you get married in the first place or did you want to eat your cake and also keep it? Marriage is a bargain and like in every bargain, there is usually a trade-off bargained for. Remember it is easy to honor Rodney King's "why can't we all get along" in marriage or any relationship provided parties are mindful that all men out there see you through the lens of your husband and trying to please them is a vain effort if you cannot please your husband. Ditto all those "MUCHO MACHO" males out there who think that the only way to prove their manliness is through unbearable subjugation of their partners (wives). Apply the golden rule of reciprocal acceptance of what you met out and watch your relationship bloom like spring rose. 

Anyway, just a penny for your thoughts BUT be rest assured that spouses always want to do better and will always do better for their spouse if they are always acknowledged, encouraged and respected as a loving spouse. All those other "sidekicks" who are distracting you, ask yourself where were there before you met your spouse? That out of the billions of humans out there, you two found yourself is magical already. Remember that you cannot find love in a spouse whom you have shown no love BUT hate; and neither can you expect a sad and angry spouse to give you joy and happiness. No one ever gives what he/she does not have, own or possess. If you want something, give something first and in return, you will get a bountiful. Start today to be the best spouse you can be and see your wish of a dream home come alive. 

In conclusion, Icheoku wishes continuing happiness to all those happily married couples who are enjoying the warm comfort of each other and in the same vein admonishes all those whose households have turned into an unbearably, nightmarish living hell.  Remember to make your exit as quickly as you can if such situation cannot be sanctified and get out fast before it is too late. Life is not a rehearsal and only the living can maintain a relationship because the moment you are pushed off the cliff, your bereaved spouse will possibly fall into the embrace of your best friend? But hey, what does Icheoku know about matrimonial harmony except that you know you got it if it makes you feel good. Salute!

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